Bayou Blogs

After another heartache, and I apologize for yall having to deal with my bad relationships all these years. I know it must be at a point where you may feel for me how the public feels for Jennifer Anniston. After the 50th heartache for Jennifer, you think-’oh, poor Jennifer, nice girl’ But now it is turning to ‘what the hell is wrong with her?’ I have decided to abstain from not just sex, but a relationship all together for 12 months. Of course my friends say it can’t be done. They think I should shorten it to 6 months. Then another friend thinks 6 weeks. Another one 6 days and Mitch said 6 minutes. (toys and self love do not count) At any rate, I’m going to try. And really try to figure out WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME. Do you know? Geesh, I must sound like a crazy pathetic person. I admit perhaps some meds are in my future for this type of thing. Thankfully I have the Bayou and the Workforce to get me thru…AGAIN. Yall are my shrink. So, celibacy, here I come! Anyone wanna join me?

I’m not Oprah or anything and I don’t normally plug a book for you but you gotta check this one out! After 14 years together, Doug and Annie were a typical couple approaching middle age while being parents and leading careers. But when was their time for sex??? With a crazy idea, they decided to give thier marriage a jolt- by having lots and lots of sex! For 101 days straight! No excuses! they just DID IT.

I’ve done that too. In my dreams. With Brad Pitt, George Clooney, Brett Michaels, Smith Jerrod, Mitt Romeny (shut up), Owen Wilson……….