Bayou Blogs

It’s that time of the year again workforce, for my ANNUAL 29th BIRTHDAY BASH! Happening Sunday September 28th at RAZZOO! (511 Bourbon St. in the FQ) 4pm, following the Saints home game. Another throw down to celebrate me being 29! AGAIN! It’s a New Orleans tradition! Hope yall can make it! No birthday spankings please, I’m still sore from last year!

(posted by KAT)

That’s gonna be the name of my new motel-EVACUATE-INN, very evacuation friendly. Free gas til it runs out, plenty of water and booze and free laundry facilities. Also, I’ll have a ‘musicians lodge’. A tavern with a stage so evacuated musicians can plug in and play. And a huge yard with kennels and pet baby sitters for your evacuated pets. A swimming pool too. 1 for pets, 1 for people. All rooms will have 2 bunk beds, 2 king size beds, and 2 pull out couches. Flat screens, porn and cable. Price for a night will be $69.00. (fema vouchers accepted) I don’t want to actually make a profit off of evacuated people. So any profit I make, I will then donate back to the effected area to help the recovery. I will have a safe broadcast facility for all my radio friends to work out of. TV peeps too. A small non-denomonational chapel on premise as well. I’ll also have a small landing strip for small planes and helicopters to land on if they have to. Maybe the president, Bobby J and Sugar Ray Nagin could put that to use. And the military, fema, red cross, etc. I would open a chain of EVACUATE-INN’s. A few on I-55 North, I-10 East and West, Shreveport, Memphis, Atlanta, the pan-handle and of course Baton Rouge. In the non-hurricane season, Evacuate-Inns will be normal motels. BUT, that is when I would maybe the jack the price of the room up to normal rates. I would have musicians perform at my Inns during the off season. Big names like Aerosmith, Sammy Hagar, Journey, Foo Fighters, Miley Cyrus etc. So peeps would still come during the non-hurricane seasons. Maybe some gambling on premise as well. And weddings and private partys. Who wouldn’t want to get married at an EVACUATE-INN????? Don’t even think about stealing this idea! I have already gone to my lawyer and am getting a patent or whatever so no one can steal this idea. My lawyer has many of my ideas on file. He says one of these days when one of them actually comes true, then thats when I pay him. The Evacuate-Inn’s will be such a success and they will have helped so many evacuees that I will be recognized by the White House. They will give me an award of some-sort. Maybe not the actual president. They will prob have the vice president give to me. Either that chick or Biden. When I accept the award, I will go to the podium and yell- “West bank forever-word!” make the rock face, race my fist in the air and scream some more. I call that ‘evacuettes syndrome’ (like tourettes syndrome, when you evacuate, you just want to scream random stupid stuff out loud for no reason) Now I just need a rich backer to do this. Sydney Torres, you reading this???

And fyi, I talked to god, Ike isn’t a threat to New Orleans. We’re good.

Please, pray, dance, chant, whatever you do to communicate with your higher power, (Bob Breck) do it and make GUSTOV GO AWAY! Think the worst, hope for the best. Be prepared, blah blah blah, right?? Am I the only one having Katrina flashbacks and anxiety?? To break it down, Bayou 95.7 with be with yall every step of the way. We will, at some point, switch over to sister station WWL for full-on Gustov coverage. We will be in that mode tfn. After it is appropriate to start rocking you out again, we will flip back to regular rock programming. Stay with us. We were here for you for Katrina and we ain’t goin’ anywhere now.

The Anniversary of Katrina is here, Remember the heros and those lost. And remember, we are still ONE New Orleans

After another heartache, and I apologize for yall having to deal with my bad relationships all these years. I know it must be at a point where you may feel for me how the public feels for Jennifer Anniston. After the 50th heartache for Jennifer, you think-’oh, poor Jennifer, nice girl’ But now it is turning to ‘what the hell is wrong with her?’ I have decided to abstain from not just sex, but a relationship all together for 12 months. Of course my friends say it can’t be done. They think I should shorten it to 6 months. Then another friend thinks 6 weeks. Another one 6 days and Mitch said 6 minutes. (toys and self love do not count) At any rate, I’m going to try. And really try to figure out WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME. Do you know? Geesh, I must sound like a crazy pathetic person. I admit perhaps some meds are in my future for this type of thing. Thankfully I have the Bayou and the Workforce to get me thru…AGAIN. Yall are my shrink. So, celibacy, here I come! Anyone wanna join me?

Congratz Michael Phelps! Bringin’ home the gold at the Summer Olympics 7 times! His ears act as an extra set of flippers. Way to go team USA!

Yep, she’s 63! That’s British Actress Helen Mirran. It’s ok to look! She’s all real! and 63 years old!! And looking hot in a bikini!

And his team The Soul for winning the Arena Bowl Sunday. That’s who we were rooting for! Jon’s hair is always the champion! And thanx Jon, for that awesome breakfast this morning!

97 miles of the mighty MississiP is closed to due the oil spill yesterday. Nagin said the water is safe but use caution…????? wtf does that mean? can we drink it or not?? The clean up is on-going. I have heard mostly people talking about saving the wildlife surrounding the area. What, the rats?? Is this going to take months and months to clean up as well? The smell is waffing uptown now. It has moved from the cbd and downtown to the uptown area. Most of us can’t even notice. Smell? in New Orleans? really?!

Barackstar Obama has finally visited the middle east. Visiting with troups and meeting with leaders. He invited the elite of the press. Guess my invatation was lost in the mail. Mean while, John McCain is hangin with the Bush #1 at his mansion/cottage in Maine. Riding golf carts and eating lobster. I’m not sure what is more dangerous. Being in the middle east or letting Bush #1 drive a golf cart!

Actor Christian Bale, who is currently Batman in the awesomest movie ever Dark Knight, and the best movie batman ever, was arrested Sunday night in London for assault. They let him out briefly so he could go to the London premiere of Dark Knight. He has since gone back to the London police and remains in custody. Where is Robin to help bust him out???