My friends car got towed last night. To a niegborhood I believe they call HELL. Yes, he was parked illegally. In Metry of all places. However, the lot he was parked in was a friend/client of his! He just figured it would be ok to park there. The towing company however, couldn’t have cared less. My friend told them he could call the owner of the lot and that he would say it was ok and to not tow him. The Towing peeps explained that it was too late and that the car was already towed to the tow lot and that the only way to get it out was to pay CASH. I politely told them they were dooshbags and that I understood they were only doing thier job but if they really wanted to help us out they could. I did offer up a ’side deal’ if you will. Cash for them to pocket and our left overs from Copeland’s Social City. (Redfish, crab meat and a HUGE Chocolate cake!) They weren’t buyin it. They gave us directions to the tow lot and said they would meet us there in 10 minutes. They reminded us CASH ONLY. We then jumped in my car and went to the hood. By now it was past midnite. We rolled up to the tow lot. I think I saw a sign that said “Welcome to Hell, you are going to Die”. Felt like Iraq or maybe the short days after Katrina. No street lights. Very dark. Scary. One light above the gate at the tow lot. With a sign on the gate that said CASH ONLY. We figured we shouldn’t be sitting in the hood infront of a tow lot with a sign that said CASH ONLY. If I were a thieve, I would have robbed us. Neither one of us were packin either. I also was cranking Van Halen from my radio and thought maybe I should turn this down. Try to blend in. So we just drove around. Did the same loop for AN HOUR AND A HALF! (look kids, Big Ben) I kept calling the tow truck. WERE ARE YOU? IF WE DIE IT IS YOUR FAULT! GET YER ASSES HERE NOW! I WILL JUMP THE GATE AND DRIVE THE CAR OUTTA HERE RIGHT NOW IF YOU ARE NOT HERE IN 2 MINUTES! YALL HAVE THE WORST JOB IN THE WORLD!! LIKE SIMON COWELL AND BILL COLLECTORS! My friend, who, fyi, is the nicest man in the world and of all peeps does not deserve his car to get towed. He is not as street smart as me. (I think I am anyways) And he was mortified that I was being ballsy with the tow peeps. The driver was a huge greasy smelly dude that couldn’t or just didn’t speak. And the other one was a chick! A tiny little spit fire. I know she is just trying to make a living. But an hour and a half later I had HAD IT. They finally showed. This whole time I had my cell phone on and had already dialed 9-1 and was saving the last 1 for just incase. It cost 180 bucks. I gave her 2- one hundred dollar bills. She then said she didn’t have change. I went ballistic at this point. (no atm in this neighborhood and even if there was- are you effin kidding me??) Fat boy in the driver seat just sat there. My freind turned every shade of white there is and he may even have blacked out a bit. I told spitfire-THEN YOU WILL TAKE ONE HUNDRED DOLLARS AND WE’LL CALL IT A NIGHT. She argued some then gave up. We got the car for one hundred bucks. She asked me my name. I said-MY NAME? MY NAME IS FUCK OFF, THAT’S MY NAME. YOU HAVE AN AWESOME EVENING NOW!
We left. And I blasted Van Halen all the way outta hell.
Powered by FireStats