A caller today told me that I complain too much on the air so I’m going to try to be all positive right now, despite the angry man to the left who’s staring at me like I just knocked up his daughter.  So in the spirit of positivity, here we go!

I love that new car smell. What I don’t love as much are those new-car-smell-scented air fresheners. But when I say I don’t love them as much, that doesn’t mean I don’t love them. I just love the real thing more. Since both are non living, I feel confident that I didn’t hurt new-car-smell-scented air freshener’s feelings.

That was fun.

Okay, I must admit, and since we’re friends I feel I can share this with you: I fibbed a little. I actually hate new-car-smell-scented air fresheners. I don’t love them at all. Ahhhh, that feels better.

I guess sometimes you gotta let that aggression out because if you keep it bottled up it’ll just spill out whenever. The trick is to keep a balance between negative and positive, I think the Buddhists call it something. Maybe our parents were right when they told us for every bad thing you say about something, you must also say something good about it.

What, your parents didn’t say that? Your parents sucked. But I bet they were good looking…

See, I just did it! Hey, that does work.