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Archive for December, 2008

baby….its cold outside..

Sunday, December 21st, 2008

So I am sitting here at my desk…on a sunday…yep..a sunday. 16th floor looking out over downtown Seattle, the spaceneedle…The Roosevelt hotel…all blanketed in snow. Lady Antebellum is on my computer singing the classic song “Baby its cold ouside” I even have a cup of hot chocolate. I could be upset that I am unable to be at home with my family in Magnolia, and that I am here at work….but I am not upset. It is actually kind of neat and exciting.  The entire city has shut down except for the hotels and just one or two crazy people out “trying” to drive in it. I heard on the news and from several locals that this is an oddity and that the last time there was this much snow was about 21 years ago. I have been here a month, and have never really lived in this extreme of a climate…I like it. Alot. It is starting to snow again and looking out at the sound…it is invisible in the white out.

I love it here.

Thanks for making me feel welcome instantly. Our Wolf listeners are unreal. Well, it is time to bundle up and go back to my hotel. Perhaps I will watch a movie that I seem to never take time for…always is so busy. The snow slows us down from life robbing you of time that you can never get back..with those who are the most important..our friends and family.

Merry Christmas to all! And thank GOD for the snow.

obsessive compulsive

Saturday, December 20th, 2008

Ok….so every time I say something, I end it with dot com.

What is mental illness? Einstein was so smart…and yet so ignorant in the simplest of common sense. I have ocd that would make the show on tv “Monk” normal. It used to be so bad that it would wake me in the middle of the night…maybe a rug had some fuzz on it or the strings at each end of the rug  had to be perfectly straight. No crumbs on the counter, everything had a place…and a bit hesitant in admitting that yes, I HAVE vacuumed the lawn…with a real vacuum cause I thought it would look “cleaner”…cuckoo…cuckoo…..can you say “Lola has some issues?”  So through many taxing months of therapy I have gained a new prospective on myself. I have learned that not everything has to be perfect at all times. Yes it IS okay if you wake up late , not to make your bed ..etc. I have learned thru this trial with my husbands cancer that guess what? i am stronger than I ever knew or gave myself credit for. I have learned to love ME..what a

Be careful what you wish for my friend

Thursday, December 18th, 2008

So..we are what we think…right? We “create” our own destiny..right?

It was the summer of 2005. Myself and my husband and son were converting a lumber mill into an internet cafe’. Our entire world was full tilt boogie on doing all the contruction ourselves to “save” money. So we were married to this project…I was so focused on the coffee shop that I hadnt been grocery shopping in a long time (about 2 months)..we were eating on the run, instead of sitting down at the dinner table, like normal folks. So one day I stop by the local gas station to grab a hotdog and head back to our home.

Soon as I walked in the door, I realized that in my rush that I had forgotten to put mustard on my hotdog! So I went to our cupboards…then to our refrigerator…NO MUSTARD! I yelled at the top of my lungs (hormonal imbalance) “Even homeless people have mustard!!!!” Then collapsed into tears and took a nap.

And in a moment I will NEVER forget,  I woke up the next morning and went out to get the paper. Standing on my welcome mat outside the front door were 7 bottles of Frenches mustard standing like little soldiers at my front door. I lived on a big corner lot with no immediate neighbors. So noone could have heard me yelling..and noone has ever said to me…”Hey did you get the mustard I dropped off?”

7 bottles lined up at my front door…no joke. Visualization IS VERY POWERFUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 Be  careful what you wish for my friend

from seattle with love

Tuesday, December 16th, 2008

First off…I am so glad to be here in the wonderous northwest!  I could just pinch myself, (it would be more than an inch) because I feel like I have landed in Mayberry. It has been a very trying year. We found out in January 08 that my husband Rick has terminal cancer. Stage 4 melanoma with brain metastes. He is 52 years young and does not smoke, drink coffee, drink alcohol..his only vices are chocolate cake and television. So you could imagine our shock and horror. It was like someone had kicked me in the stomach and at times I will turn around too quick and there is that feeling again. I have all the faith that God has us under his arm right now, and I am feeling pretty positive. It has been the biggest blessing to move to Seattle where people actually care about you. My neighbors from ACROSS the street came over to introduce themselves…I thought that was very cool. I grew up in a small town “Linden” where people care too, so I really feel like I am home. And we all know home is where the heart is.    xoxo

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