Doesn’t seem possible ten years ago this month I was standing in the kitchen making dinner for 5 people. Three kids, a man and myself. We lived in Rome, NY then we moved to Wichita, KS. Six years later and 1 dog later we ended our relationship. Not really sure to this today why it all ended. I guess maybe because I was young. I was 25 when we met, he was 36. I thought I had it all. A ready made family, 3 great kids, a beautiful house, and well established loving man. I guess after the move to Wichita, KS I realized maybe perhaps I got in too deep over my head. Taking on more than I could handle. Don’t get me wrong, we had some of the best days of my life. Our holidays always were so warm and homey. I remember I would take off work 5 days prior to the holiday (mainly Thanksgiving and Christmas) and I would spend all day, and I mean ALL day just baking. The house would be surrounded with cookies, buttermilk pies, pumpkin pies, apple pies, you name it..I baked it. We both were in the Air Force at the time so we had steady jobs, money was never an issue with us. I guess looking back now, the issue was ME. Me trying to find myself. I needed to explore the world and be on my own to prove to myself that I didn’t need anyone to take care of me. I moved out and headed East where I got transferred to the Pentagon to work. The kids would call me for Mother’s day and wish me a happy mother’s day. Always made me wonder if I made the right decision to leave in the first place. Although [he] and I didn’t keep too much in contact throughout the years we were broken up, I knew in my heart that one day we would be back together…I just needed to “find myself”.
After many moves from Washington, DC to Virginia, to Pennsylvania, back to Virginia, on to Rochester, NY, on to Sacramento, Ca, to here San Francisco, Ca I think I may have finally “found myself”. Not too long ago, as you know I was in a long distance relationship which at the time I felt was my whole life. When in fact, what I’ve learned now was that was only “a part of my life”.
For some reason, not sure what, I decided to call my my very distant past and reach out. Not knowing what would happen or if even he would talk to me again, I took the chance and to my surprise he was single as I was. Both of us getting over a relationship many months ago. Strange how the heart knows no time. Our conversation was just like it used to be when we first dating, it was almost like we never left each other…and who’s to say if we ever really did.
People tell me that “you broke up for a reason, let it go, move on”. Now, I can say “I have moved on, I’ve moved on to a life which I don’t think I ever should have left.” Is it possible to “re-find” love after so many years have passed by? I know one thing now, that I’m happy we re-found each other and to me it doesn’t seem like it was so “long ago…and so far away” and maybe there are things we may have forgotten about our life then, I know in our hearts…Love Remembers.
PS. Have you kindled love after so many years? Share your story, write in the comments block.
Until Next Time,
Much Love,
Nikki
4 comments ↓
Hello Nikki,
I know that I don’t need anyone to take care of me but it would be nice. haha 
I guess you have the old memories but need to work on some new ones.
I have popped in here lots to see what your writing about time to time. I heard something on the radio a few days back you wrote something about your past, so I had to come and see.
Well, the young gal that I am,hehe, haven’t rekindled a love after soooo many years, but I do think about “what are their lives like now”.
I think its great that you had that experience in the past as I feel that we have different turns in our lives that come about that makes us better people. I think its a good thing thou to try and find yourself and explore the world. I have to say that we always can say “WHAT IF” but we can’t change things. I always say the “WHAT IF” about a old relationship, but than I look at it that if I didn’t move on and have other relationships I wouldn’t have learned I don’t think what a relationship means for me.
I never had lots of relationships when I was younger so I thought the first one was it. But I have to say that I’m glad that I had the other men come in my life to teach me something else to better myself on communication. I do wish that the first relationship I was more open but like you said, to find yourself is a big thing. And I think moving to San Francisco opened me up to a different world and I think I’m a different person which is good.
Well, I hope things work out for you as I know your last relationship was a hard one to get over. Oh, okay we never get over them I feel. But moving on is the best thing to do and I hope you can start up a new relationship with your 10yr ex.
Good luck and glad to hear some spunk back in your personal life.
HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!
Neither have I rekindled a love though it’s been 15 years since I’ve seen my wife. But, I read recently that humans not only can change their circumstances, but time as well. The holidays don’t have to be remembering the past, by comparison, but kindling for the future, by planning. But I learned the easy way to make new joys for someone, to find new joys for myself. I don’t feel you’ve re-found yourself as much as accepted nurture for the peron that still lingers within. And joy to you who can open that person so well here. May Thanksgiving be true for you even more!
Respectfully,
Jerry L
You hear about “old” love reuniting all the time. In fact one of my girlfriends grandma’s (80+) is shacking up with her 1st fiance. He looked her up after his 1st wife passed away….60+ years after they had been engaged. Turns out her husband had passed as well. Now they are happily living together. Love remembers….so I say why wait until you are 80+ Life is meant to be lived and enjoyed now!! Go for it!
Well I was out in the Vacaville area not long ago on business and was visiting friends that I flew with when I was stationed at Travis Air Force Base many years ago. As I was surfing thru the radio channels, headed back to SFO Int. for my flight home, an amazing thing happened….. I recognized a voice from my past on the radio….I thought, no way, it can’t be her….. The most “beautiful girl” (inside and out) that I have ever met, brought flashbacks to my mind as I was driving down the 80, listening to her voice over the radio. When I got home and checked the station website…..I was beside myself, what a beautiful accomplished women she has become. While our summer love was short lived, I never forgot her, and never will. She gave me the self confidence I needed to leave an abusive relationship I was in. I am now a successful person, as I can see she also has become. I guess we both finally found ourselves and lives we are both happy with…..she’s knows how to get a hold of me
if she would like to shoot the breeze. I would just like to close out by wishing you and your family a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year….Your New Jersey Friend….Theo
Leave a Comment